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Feelings of worth and value play an important role in an individual’s perception of self-esteem and confidence. Other things such as personal values, self-belief, and an ability to cope with basic problems can contribute to feelings of self-esteem and confidence.

When you have low self-confidence you may find that you feel:

  • low
  • upset
  • tearful
  • sad
  • vulnerable
  • worthless
  • useless

You may also experience thoughts like:

  • ‘No one likes me’
  • ‘I’m not good enough’
  • ‘Others are much better at everything compared to me’
  • ‘I am useless’
  • ‘I am not worthy’
  • ‘I don’t deserve any better’

You may also notice that:

  • you are spending more time alone
  • you are sleeping too much or too little
  • you have stopped doing the things you enjoy
  • you put others before yourself
  • you don’t express your opinions
  • you are over caring and over helpful
  • you find it hard to say no to people
  • people take advantage of your good nature

Difficulties with self esteem or self confidence can be linked to a variety of issues including:

Stressful life events

These can be unwelcome or traumatic, such as being bullied at work, getting divorced, or being attacked/abused.

Negative thinking

Sometimes you may start to think negatively due to an event or situation. This can then become a habit and part of your general outlook; you may not even be aware of how negatively you were thinking or how this is impacting on you.

Lack of interest or reduction of pleasurable activities

Sometimes, due to circumstances, you may reduce activities that you gained pleasure, satisfaction, or achievement from. You then do not increase these activities as soon as possible, instead you may forget just how much you benefited from these activities, causing you to have a lack of interest in doing them.


If you struggle to express your feelings, particularly anger, you may find that your self-esteem or confidence is low as a result of not expressing your anger or frustration in a safe way.

Repeated failure or rejection

If you have tried your best at something and you keep failing, or you feel rejected from an experience, you may develop low self-esteem. This can occur in a variety of situations, such as applying for jobs, taking exams for school or university, or in social circles/groups.

If you would like support with self confidence or self esteem please refer yourself by ringing 0191 282 6600 or complete our online referral form.

For more information about self-confidence, please click here.

What to expect

Find out more information about our service and what you can expect from the process here.

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What we offer

There are a large range of therapies available to help you within our service. You can read more about the techniques we use here.

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We have a range of courses available as part of our service. Click the link below to find out more.

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Frequently asked questions

It is common to have many questions about our service, we have answered many of the common questions here.

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Talking Helps Newcastle is not liable for the contents of any external internet sites listed, nor does it endorse any commercial product or service mentioned or advised on any of the sites. Always consult your own GP or ourselves if you’re in any way concerned about your emotional wellbeing.